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From Mensagenda - February 2004

The Third Side
by Tim Goetsch


Giving Credit Where Credit is Due, at the End of Every Month

Have you ever done something you knew was stupid, but you did it anyway, and then you spent years paying for your mistake and regretting it?

Yeah, you can guess what kind of article this is going to be.

Some people overeat. Some people don’t finish college. Some people dream big but don’t follow through. I’ve done all those things, plus I’ve racked up credit card debt. Stupid, stupid credit card debt. Stupidest thing I’ve ever gotten involved in.

If it weren’t for credit card debt, I wouldn’t have to be on a budget. Actually it technically isn’t a budget, but, for the purposes of this article, it’s a budget, and if I weren’t in debt I wouldn’t need one. Except that if I had a budget in the first place, I wouldn’t be in this mess.

I figure that if I didn’t have credit card debt, I could buy a new computer and then, three months later, throw it away and buy another. Then again, it was buying a computer that put me on the first step along this slippery slope. Fortunately the computer comes with a spreadsheet program, so I can plot my budget (which isn’t really a budget). Sometimes the shovel you use to dig yourself a hole is the one you use to dig yourself out.

You can probably see how this article is going. It’s a lot like the old joke about the guy going around, saying, “I wish I could afford an elephant.” When his friends ask what he would want with an elephant, he says, “I don’t want to buy one. I just wish I could afford one.” Big joke. Substitute “car” for “elephant,” it would be just as funny to me. Substitute “house,” and suddenly it stops being funny.

Ah, the dreams you can have about money you don’t have. Better home. Better food. Wild women. Hawaii. Grand Canyon. Duluth. But then you realize you’re looking for a new shovel to dig a new hole. Too bad. I liked Duluth.

I won’t go into how much I owe. Whenever I tell others about it, they usually snort and say something like, “Amateur! Can’t you dig a deeper hole than that?” It might not seem like a lot to others, but it is to me. A few years ago I sat down and figured out that, even when sending in every spare penny that I could, it was going to take about thirtyfive years to pay the thing off. I was pretty discouraged about that, since I had already scheduled being dead or retired by then.

That revelation came about four years ago. Since then I’ve gotten a better job and a better interest rate. Payoff date is now about two and a half years off. A much better deal, but the self-imposed poverty is still no fun.

C’mon, Daddy needs a new shovel. Or an IRA. I have two and a half years to decide.
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